Marriage and Vehicular Manslaughter

This past weekend my best friend was inducted into the "Marriage Club." Membership fee is quite high and monthly payments increase in cost as length of involvment progresses. I have heard that it is a very fun club and that the benefits outweigh the costs. It was a fun weekend to say the least. I couldn't help but laugh during the whole induction ceremony. These two people have been my friends for a very long time and I hope that they will remain such. Seeing them getting married was something that I've seen coming for basically...forever...and the fact that it finally happened was pretty funny!! I think I find it funny because I know them very well and I know that now they are married, things will still be the same between them. This is a good thing don't worry. Most people shy away from wedding season but I have fully embrassed it with open and loving arms. Here are my top 5 reasons for supporting weddings as a single white male.



1) Bachelor parties normally occur before weddings. Being single is a mute point.

2) Food...free food at that. Rehearsal dinner. Wedding breakfast. Wedding brunch. Snacks at wedding during pictures. Reception food. Enough said.

3) The best and possibly only time to request "Pour Some Sugar on Me" at the reception.

4) Bridesmaids feel obligated to be nice to you because you are in the wedding too...its like a team.

5) Wedding Cake...this needs no explanations. If you don't like wedding cake, you don't like life or dolphins or little sea otters or heaven on earth. Everyone likes wedding cake.



Congratulations Mark and Taylor!! I'm very happy for your marriage. You will probably never read this but I wrote it and therefore I feel good.



So you might be wondering as to what the second portion of this entry's title means, "Vehicular Manslaughter." Well I would joyfully like to explain. Basically, the reason that I felt the urge to blog was from my little encounter about 5 minutes ago on my way home from the grocery store with my loving, sweet, small mother. (Insert awwww). Side note: When you go to the grocery store around 3:30pm, at least in West Little Rock, it is a very strange occurance. I was keeping track of how many men there were in the store under the age of 50. I counted 2. One of them was myself. The rest are mothers, grandmothers, grandfathers, soccer moms, workout moms, stressed out moms, wrestling candy away from their children moms. I felt very out of place and somewhat protective of all these women. I felt like the man of the house...in super market form. If something heavy was to be picked up it was basically my responsibility. I was the only young man there. Did I like this new responsibility? Yes I did. I felt cool. I felt productive (mainly because I hadn't been out of the house yet today and it was 3:30pm). I felt like the school teacher during World War I when all the other men were at war. Ok thats a stretch but it was strange. Somewhat overwhelming at first, but you kinda get use to it. Anyways, back to vehicular manslaughter....There has been some new road work occuring on Chenal Parkway right by Kroger. A portion of the road is closed and you must take a detour on a newly built road. I'm sitting at the stop light, trying to cross Chenal Parkway to embark on my detour. The car in front of me chooses to try and turn left onto the closed road. After realizing their idiotic mistake, they decided that their best option at that point was to drive on the left side of the detour road. Great decision. As they crest the hill, enter moving truck. After a moment of sheer panic on my part, both cars come to a safe stop. Too bad the car behind the moving truck didn't. Wham...see ya later front bumper. Did I stop...no...[Rule #1: every man for himself on the detour.] This isn't your ordinary detour though. This detour has a legit, purpose serving, "round-a-bout." As I approach the round-a-bout, already clogged with bewildered detourers, I can tell this is going to be disastorous. [Rule #2: Be brave in round-a-bouts, but not too brave. Keep your head on a swivel.] As I enter this round-a-bout which is massive, two lanes entering and exiting in all directions, I see a car swerve behind me, cutting off the car which was previously behind me. No worries, press on. However, I continue to watch as that car is T-Boned by a car entering the circle of death who clearly thought they didn't have to yield. That will teach that person to not cut someone off again I guess. Did I stop...no...[Rule #3: When you witness 2 wrecks in less than 2 minutes...drive faster...eyes forward...hands at 10 and 2...you are now in full fledge traffic terrorism.]



Disclaimer: Even though I only have 2 followers, I'm still going to write as if I'm writing to the whole country of China...except in English. It makes me feel better. Nevertheless, I'm continuing my efforts on brainstorming ideas to increase my follower count. I will continue the music recommendations as well as open the line for the suggestions. I'm also contemplating games, trivia, and prizes. Be looking for those coming soon.



Disclaimer to the Disclaimer: I realize that the "Disclaimer" should normally come at the beginning of a blog but that doesn't lend well for double disclaimers now does it?



Song of the Entry:

Shutterbug by Big Boi